


Legacy of secrets and lies (a boyband drama)

by noellehenry



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: A tiny bit of smut, Drama, HL Spring Exchange 2016, Judge's house, M/M, Mute Zayn, Mystery, X-Factor - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-02
Updated: 2016-04-02
Packaged: 2018-05-30 17:47:49
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 16,737
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6434296
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/noellehenry/pseuds/noellehenry
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>AU where One Direction was withdrawn from the X-Factor in 2010 after a heartbreaking drama. Ten years later, after Simon Cowell's sudden death, they are summoned to the former X-Factor house, forced to spend time together and untangle the web of secrets and lies from their shared past.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [blue_marauder](https://archiveofourown.org/users/blue_marauder/gifts).



> For blue_marauder and the prompt :
> 
> Harry is renting a room in Louis's house. Louis tells Harry the basement is totally, 100% off-limits, which Harry doesn't think anything of until he starts hearing strange noises coming from the basement at night.
> 
> I took some liberty adjusting the prompt somewhat, technically Louis doesn't own the house :-) I hope you'll like it.
> 
> A big thanks goes to Abbie for beta reading the entire fic!
> 
>  
> 
> [tumblr post](https://noellehenryfics.tumblr.com/post/171104872506/legacy-of-secrets-and-lies-a-boyband-drama-by)  
> 

                                     

 

Harry and Liam walk around the house. It’s a grand house, nothing like Highclere Castle though, just a big, old house full of old junk really. A mahogany chest looming against the far wall, a couple of landscape paintings on the walls. The house feels… cold, unloved.

 

Harry pulls some old music sheets from a shelf, landing on the floor, the dust prickles his nose. There are so many of them, memories of their X-Factor days float through his mind when his eyes catch the title of a song “Viva la vida”. There’s a lot of X-Factor history on these shelves. He remembers Savan Kotecha, their coach, having them sing it over and over again, until they got the harmonies right. Harry picks up the sheets from the dirty floor and piles them back up on the shelf. His fingers feel something else on the shelf. He pulls it off, a yellow ribbon, a bit faded. He runs his finger over the fabric. There’s something in the back of his mind, something he knows he should recognize, but he doesn’t remember. Has he seen it before? He frowns and puts it back on the sheets.

 

His foot steps on something, Harry looks down. It’s a picture, colors weak. He picks it up, a thick lump is forming in his throat. He recognizes the boys in the picture, five teenagers laughing at the camera, full of confidence. His thumb smooths the wrinkles.

 

Liam, their anchor, the experienced X-Factor contestant, the one they looked up to, then Niall, the Irish boy, loud and fun, their musician, next to him, Harry, the youngest, the baby with his curly hair and dimples. Then… Louis, the oldest, full of pranks, loud, a ball of energy, sparkling blue eyes. Harry’s thumb runs over Louis’ paper face, it still hurts, after all those years, he never forgot Louis, and finally, Zayn… he disappeared.

 

Sometimes Louis and Zayn would disappear together for an hour or two, telling Harry, Liam and Niall not to spy on them. Liam didn’t mind, but Harry and Niall felt left out. Whenever they were coming back they were giggling and laughing. One day they were about to go when Niall said “I’m coming too.” “Me too.” Harry had said. Louis and Zayn had looked at each other and then nodded. “Alright, but you have to promise to not say anything to anyone, promise?” Niall and Harry promised. They followed Zayn and Louis to the lake.

 

“We’re here !” Louis announced. “It’s just a lake, man! What’s so secret about that?” Niall had shouted. “Nothing.” Louis had grinned. Niall had just shrugged. “Follow me.” Harry, Niall and Zayn followed Louis through the trees. All of a sudden he stopped at a birch tree, a big one with a smooth trunk. Louis climbed the tree, with a few practised swings he sat amidst the green leaves above the other boys. Looking up they saw a tree hut. “Wow!” Niall exclaimed, following Louis to the tree house. Zayn and Harry remained on the ground. “Go grab the stuff.” Zayn shouted at Louis. “It’s brilliant up here !” Niall exclaimed. “Glad you like it, young Niall.” Louis said.

 

“Did you guys built it?” Zayn snorted from his spot under the tree. “As if!”

“Sorry to say, but no… it was already here, but it’s a great spot to hide.” Louis came down with Niall in his wake. “What’s that?” Harry had asked, pointing at the bottle in Louis’ hand. Louis wrapped an arm around him and said “This, my dear Harold, is vodka.” Harry had looked at him in disbelief.

“Aren’t you too young to be having a bottle of liquor in your possession?” Liam said from behind them. “Shit! Payno…” Louis cursed. “Well?” Liam stood there, arms crossed. “Who says it’s in my possession?” Louis smirked. Liam glared at him. “You’re holding it, aren’t you?” Louis shrugged and sat down on the ground. He opened the bottle and took a sip before handing it to Zayn. “Are you two serious?” Liam asked in horror. “You want some too, Liam?” Zayn offered him the bottle, but Liam declined.

“We should be practicing. You guys coming?” He asked Niall and Harry. Niall shook his head. “Harry?” he just looked down. He didn’t want to disappoint Liam, but he loved being around Louis. Louis was full of adventures and funny. Zayn and Louis didn’t offer the bottle to them. “You’re too young, boys.” Louis had patted them both on their heads.

The next days they spent a lot of time near the lake once the rehearsals were over, they sneaked out. Liam never came with them.

 

In his head Zayn and Louis had always been the cool ones in their short-lived existence as a boyband. Louis had been eighteen and Zayn seventeen. Liam and Niall were almost seventeen, but Harry had just turned sixteen early that year. Liam had been Simon’s favorite, probably Savan’s too. Liam was a professional, while Harry and the other boys were less fanatical. They were not as driven as Liam was. Zayn had been the mysterious one, handsome, laidback and had a great voice. Harry wondered what he would have looked like now, ten years later.

 

*********

 

Niall hasn’t changed a bit! Liam hugs him on the platform. “Niall Horan” Harry calls to him and puts his arms around him. “My God, it’s been ages! How have you been?”

“Good ! You’re a proper rockstar now, aren’t ya?” Harry nods shyly. He’s the only one who pursued a career as a pop singer.”Yeah, you’re doing alright too, I heard.”

“Got me own sports talk show now!” Niall says proudly. “And Liam, mate, didn’t know you had producer skills!” Liam smiles. “Just produced Jennifer Lopez’ new album.” “Modest as always.” Harry pats Liam on the shoulder.

“Have you two been in the house ?” Liam and Harry nod. “Yeah, it felt...weird, unnerving. Hard to believe it was such a grand house when we were up here… back in the day.” Liam quietly says. They look at each other, each one of them knowing what the others think.

 

Harry and Niall tour the grounds while Liam stays behind, telling them to go ahead. They walk through the dreary woods until they arrive at the lake. It’s drizzling, but they don’t notice. They stand still looking over the lake, raindrops causing ripples on the surface. “Remember how we swam in it?” Niall’s hands are in his pockets. “You, me and Liam. Louis never went all the way in, whining it was too cold.” Harry muses. “You think Louis got a letter too?” Niall sounds hesitant. “I suppose so.” Harry says, sadly. “I wonder what’s he’s been doing all these years.”

 

They head back towards the house, running, dugging their heads as the rain starts pouring down. Niall opens the front door and they barge in, shrugging off their wet jackets. They hear shouting from the kitchen. “Sounds like there’s another visitor.” Niall looks meaningful at Harry. Harry swallows, one voice is Liam’s, the other one is unmistakenly Louis’, high pitched and still has the thick Yorkshire accent. He follows Niall.

 

“Tommo! Good to see you !” Niall shouts as if nothing ever happened. “Niall, well isn’t this great. A One Direction reunion.” Louis replies sarcastically. Niall seems to be taken aback a little by Louis’ sneer. “And… Harry.” Louis’ eyes seem to soften a little, but Harry probably imagines it, because Louis turns immediately towards Liam again. “Are you telling me you all got a letter from Simon’s solicitor to come and stay here for a while?” He crosses his arms in front of his chest. “Yes, didn’t you?” Liam asks with a weird look in his eyes.

 

“Yes, just didn’t think you’d be coming though.” he answers, glaring at the three men in front of him. “I see, but… here we are. All the letter says was, to report today at noon and spend three weeks at the house. If we don’t, the house will go up for auction and a secret will be revealed to the press.” Louis turns pale, his hands gripping the side of the table, knuckles white. “We all got the same letter” he whispers clearly upset.

“Apparently so. And since we’re all in the same boat, maybe we should try to get along the next three weeks.” Liam holds Louis’ gaze. Niall and Harry look from Liam to Louis. “Fine! Whatever.” Louis quickly walks to the door. “I’m going to be out for a bit, don’t wait up for me. Oh and by the way, the basement is mine and off-limits.” He slams the door shut behind him.

 

Liam’s tension seems to slide. “What was that all about?” Niall asks. Liam shrugs. “Nothing, don’t worry.” and he too leaves the kitchen.

“Is it just me or are we missing something?” Harry’s voice is hoarse. He’s never been good at confrontations. “Dunno Harry, but something’s off. Maybe we should stick together, you and I, for the next weeks. Let’s make dinner together.”

 

“It still is quite an impressive place, even if it’s not well-kept.” Niall says as he’s cooking the pasta. “Yeah, it’s got huge potential, even though it needs a lot of work.” Harry’s cutting the vegetables. “I wonder what they’re going to do with it, once we’re out of here.”

 

“Would you want to live here?”

 

“Live here?” Harry frowns. “No, that thought never crossed my mind. Although it’s a great area to live in, it’s just… the memories you know?”

 

“I know, I feel the same.” Niall softly says. “They could sell it to a developer, converting the house into holiday flats.”  “Who owns the place anyway? Do you know?” Harry wonders. Niall shakes his head.

 

“What did you think of Louis’ behavior? He was kind of aggressive to us, even though he had no reason to be.”

 

Harry puts down the knife. “I don’t know, Niall. All I know is that the man I saw in the kitchen doesn’t look like the funny and energetic Louis I remember from 10 years ago.”

 

“Wonder what happened.” Niall answers.

 

“We _know_ what happened… Niall. It’s just no reason to be hostile to _us_. Louis and Liam never got on really well.”  There’s a silence again.

 

It feels strange, most of them got on well from the beginning when they were put together to form a boyband and look at them now, noone seems to be comfortable, they didn’t antagonise each other that much in the past. The age difference between them was not that huge. From the day Simon put them together, they had fun together. They practiced hard, but they also spent a lot of time together outside of rehearsals. Harry had had a crush on Louis, he kept hidden, because Louis was straight, he had a nice girlfriend called Hannah and Harry was sure Louis saw him as a younger brother, much to Harry’s frustration.

 

He’d seen Louis getting into the lake one day, naked and whining to Zayn that the water was cold. They hadn’t known Harry had followed them. Louis was beautiful, tan all over, Harry couldn’t help but notice the curvy bum of the boy and being a teenager, the realisation he was attracted to his bandmate and the sudden swelling in his trousers made him feel embarrassed about himself. He’d always known he liked boys the way his sister liked boys, but he had never felt something for a boy like he did for Louis. How inconvenient that had been ! Sparkling, glowing and sweet Louis would never be his’.

Zayn had been watching Louis with a huge grin from his spot on the grass. Oh yes, Harry was jealous, jealous of Zayn who spent more time with Louis than any of them. They were both from Yorkshire, shared several interests, were closer in age and Zayn was much cooler than Liam, Niall or Harry. They considered Harry a bit of a posh boy, something he hated. They would call him Little Prince just to tease him; it hurt.

 

*********

 

That night they eat in silence, Liam is withdrawn and Harry and Niall just don’t know how to make conversation. Harry dreads the next weeks, they’re gonna be a long three weeks.

 

Harry chose one the bedrooms on the ground floor. Liam and Niall preferred going upstairs.

Harry put his clothes away in the cupboard after he’d cleaned the entire room with soap and water and opened the window to let in some fresh air. He’s put on joggers and a white T-shirt and lies on the bed. It’s past midnight, he’s texting Nick, telling him he feels like he stepped into a movie where he doesn’t know the script.

Nick texts back “ _Maybe you should find the script. Good luck, Haz!_ ”  He hears the front door opening and muffled voices coming closer. One of the voices is Louis’; he’s come back with someone, which annoys Harry. He surely isn’t going to bring some girl to the house on their first night here?! He hears the footsteps taking the steps to the basement, a door opening and shutting and then there’s silence. “Weird, who wants to sleep in the basement?” is the last thing Harry thinks before he falls asleep.

 

On Monday morning Harry wakes up, the tips of his fingers and toes chilled and so is his nose. It’s cold, not out of the ordinary in England, but Harry is ready to welcome Spring. He can’t remember having felt this cold. He spends a lot of his free time in Los Angeles, but is now obliged to brave the cold because the late Simon Cowell wants him to spend three weeks with men he briefly knew when he was a teenager. He gets up, takes a quick lukewarm shower, dresses warm and goes outside. He wants to be alone for a bit before he has to face the others again. He walks over the terrace.

 

The terrace, the place where they could find Zayn smoking. He was the only smoker of the group.  He would sit on the steps, inhaling deeply and exhaling in puffs. One day he’d sat down next to Zayn. “Wanna try?” Zayn had offered. Harry hadn’t want to decline, although he didn’t really want to smoke. Zayn had shown him how to inhale. Unfortunately, Harry inhaled way too deep for a first time; he’d ended up coughing ‘til the tears fell from his eyes. Louis had been watching them. “Zayn, he’s too young, man ! Don’t poison our Little Prince! “ Louis went inside and came back with a glass of water for Harry and patted him on the back until Harry had calmed down. “Here you go, love. Drink this.” “Thanks.” Harry had been so grateful for Louis’ help. “You’re welcome, curly.” Louis had smiled at him.

 

Harry walks on, everything better than staying inside that beast of a house. The atmosphere is haunting now that it’s been abandoned for years. The X-Factor series had ended five years after they had been on the show : the last series had been overshadowed by contestants leaving, fraude and lack of good judges. Harry’s career had taken off pretty quickly just after their series had ended. Simon kept in touch with him. It was in February 2011, just after his 17th birthday that Simon asked him to come to London to discuss a record deal, if he was still interested. Of course Harry had been interested! He’d signed the deal enthusiastically and by September he’d been turned into a young heart-throb with a big smile and his first single was launched.

 

“What makes you beautiful” had become a huge hit in all of Europe and Harry had been touring the countries, signing and singing. In early 2012 he went to the US to promote his first album “Up all night”. It became an overnight success. Soon other countries in the world followed and by the end of 2012 Harry was a global mega star. In the first two years he hardly made money himself, most of it went to Syco Records, the songwriters, producers and a trust fund. Since he’d started writing his own songs and touring the world, that’s when the money came in. In some ways he’d been lucky, of course, but up until now he’s still in the closet. He’s so done with it. He’s got a reputation as a womanizer, a player, great for a one-night stand, when all Harry really wants is some nice guy to cuddle with on the couch, watching silly movies and have a good laugh, waking up next to someone he loves and who loves him back, who doesn’t care if Harry sleeps with his mouth open or that his long curls are all tangled up in the morning when he wakes up, someone to eat breakfast with, the same person he cooks dinner for at night.

 

He walks in a loop via the lake, he can’t seem to stay away. He kicks a few flints. Hints of something return to him, wherever he goes on the premises. Sometimes it’s a smell, an item, like the ribbon, a view. Like little snapshots. Here at the lake is something he should remember, something more than swimming, laughing and fooling around. He crouches down, close his eyes and hugs his knees. He concentrates on the smells and sounds, the smell of a lake in summer, the rustling of leaves in the summer breeze. There is definitely something… he’s trying to know. His hand blindly finds the surface, the water is cold, his fingers go numb. A sudden fear takes over his body, for a minute he feels paralyzed and then... it’s gone.

 

He stands up slowly and heads into the woods. He’s deep in thought and doesn’t see the branch that is hanging low, he bumps into it. “Ouch!” he shouts. He rubs his forehead and continues to walk, but he’s pulled back. His curls are tangled up in the small twigs, tears well up in his eyes from the sudden pull. He tries to untangle them, but he only seems to make it worse. “Great ! Nobody knows I’m here.” he mutters to himself. Someone is approaching him from the other side. “Thank God.” Harry thinks, until he sees who it is: Louis Tomlinson.

 

Louis halts when he’s in front of Harry, he says nothing. His piercing blue eyes stare into Harry’s green ones. He just stands there, watching Harry. A feeling of unease washes over Harry, the way Louis looks at him tells him all is not as it should be. Harry takes a step back, but the pull of the twigs curled up in his hair make him flinch. Louis takes a step forward, reaching out his hand. Harry’s heart beats harder. Louis’ silence is unsettling, his entire presence seems threatening. There’s a spicy smell around him, a bit sharp. A smell that reminds Harry of weed. Maybe he’s stoned? Like Zayn and him were sometimes at the lake.

 

“Got a problem, curly?” Louis’ voice sounds calm and there’s a small smile on his lips. “No, I’m fine, really, thank you.” Harry snaps. Louis shrugs and walks on. Harry sighs, a bit relieved, but still in the grip of the tree’s branch. He pulls on his locks again and lets out a frustrated groan, when he realizes he’s only making it worse.

 

“Stand still.” Louis’ voice comes from behind. Soft fingers slowly untangle the curls bit by bit. Neither one of them says a word, Harry stands perfectly still, holding his breath when Louis’ fingers brush his face by accident. “You’re free to go now.” Louis says. Harry pats the top of his head… it’s Louis after all, you never know when he pulls a prank. Louis turns around to walk away. “Louis!” Harry calls after him. Louis looks over his shoulder. “Yeah?”

“Thanks.” Harry says quietly. “You’re welcome, curly.” Louis continues towards the lake. Harry watches him before he returns to the house.

 

It’s already noon before Harry sees any of the other guys. Liam yawns when he enters the kitchen. “Hi.” “Good day to you too.“ Harry greets him, placing his mug on the table. He finished reading the newspaper enjoying a cup of coffee. “Sorry. Haven’t slept this late in ages! Must be all the fresh countryside air I’m breathing.” He apologizes. Harry grins. “Mate, you’ve only been here one day and not outside that much.”

 

“Whatever, I had a good night’s sleep.” Liam dismisses Harry’s comment. “Niall and Louis up?” Liam pours himself a cup of coffee and settles down at the table opposite Harry. “Haven’t seen Niall yet, Louis was up early.” Harry informs him. “You met Louis?” Liam asks. “Yeah, near the lake. I went for a walk.”

“You met... at the lake?” Liam’s voice sounds tense. Harry looks up at Liam, frowning. “Sort of.” “Did he … say anything?” Liam presses. “No Liam, for whatever reason, he doesn’t seem to want to talk to me.” Harry is a bit annoyed. He feels like Liam’s interrogating him. Liam looks down. “Well, I’m going to find Niall.” Harry gets up and leaves the kitchen.

 

Niall seems to be the only who’s pleasant to be around. The sound of a guitar playing reveals Niall’s whereabouts. He’s in their old rehearsal room. Harry knocks before he enters. Niall looks up. “Hey.” he says. Niall smiles and continues playing an old Irish folksong.”Mind if I sit down and listen for a bit?” Harry asks. “No man, not at all.”  then sings along in Gaelic. The sound of Niall singing and playing relaxes Harry. Just like the old days. Niall and his guitar were inseparable, Harry liked it when he would just sit down and play some song. “Remember Savan having us repeat Torn over and over again, because you and I just couldn’t stop laughing?” Harry asks. Niall grins. “Oh yeah. I don’t remember why we were laughing, but I remember we did. I couldn’t look at you without starting again.” Harry smiles. “We must have been a pain to work with. Liam was so serious. I can still see him glaring at us.”  Niall starts to play Torn and for no reason at all Harry bursts out in laughter, not long before Niall joins him.

 

After they’ve stopped laughing, Harry asks out of the blue. “What did you do after you and I were sent home after…” He swallows and then continues quietly. “after Zayn disappeared?” Niall looks at him all serious now and puts the guitar aside. “They put me on a plane to Dublin. My dad picked me up. I don’t remember much from the ride back home. It all seemed so unreal. Some time after it happened, I went back to school and on to university, that’s where I started doing the occasional reports on sport events for the Uni’s radio station. I got asked to cover for a sports commentator on local TV one day and from then on I got more opportunities to report bigger events and two years later I was on National TV: the rest is history.” Niall tells him. “Good for you !” Harry means it. Niall is obviously content with what he’s doing.

 

“How about you, popstar? Who would have thought, that one of us would become as famous as you are?” Harry folds his hands in front of him. “I got a call from Simon early 2011, just after the X-Factor finals. He wanted to talk. My mum came with me. He wanted to know if I was still interested in a career on stage and told us about his plans for me. Of course I was excited, I got a second chance. I asked about you guys, but Simon just shook his head and said it was just me. I never knew if you guys weren’t interested anymore or that he wanted just me. I wanted to get in touch, but… you know what they said when we got sent home: no contact whatsoever between any of us in the future. It never felt right in the beginning. I missed having others with me on stage. I don’t know if you’ve been following me in my career. I saw you once on TV, when I was touring. I don’t even remember what sports you were commenting on, it just was nice to see you all excited doing what you do.” Harry ends.

 

Niall smiles at him. “I’ve got all your albums, I even went to see a show in Dublin, five years ago, but like you said. I didn’t dare to get in touch either.” They’re both silent. “Are you seeing someone?”  “Yep, a girl named Noreen. We knew each other at uni. You?” Harry shakes his head. ”According to the tabloids, you’ve dated just about every famous female in the world.” Niall says.

 

“I’m gay, Niall.” Harry whispers. He feels a hand on his arm. Harry looks up. “I know.”

“Y-you know?” Harry stutters. “Yeah, always have known.”

“But… how? I never said anything!”  

“The way you looked at Louis, when you thought noone was watching you.” Harry buries his face in his hands and shakes his head. “Was I that obvious?”

Niall nods with a smile. “D-did the others know?” “I think Zayn knew. I doubt Liam registered your glances at Louis. Don’t think Louis knew though.”

“I hope not. He seemed to be happy with his girlfriend.” Harry remembers sadly.

 

There are noises in the basement when Harry walks back to his bedroom. There’s a thud and then Louis’ voice pleading “Calm down ! It’s alright, I’ve got you. Sssh, please be quiet.” Harry is about to walk downstairs to inquire if everything’s alright, but then remembers he and Louis aren’t exactly on speaking terms, so he heads to his bedroom and lays down. So far, the past days have been tedious. They all seem to avoid each other, so what’s the purpose of them being here together, he wonders. Niall is cool, but neither Liam nor Louis are trying to start a conversation. Louis appears to be gone most of the time. Liam acts nervous all the time. Harry wishes he could just leave, but the letter insisted they stayed together for three weeks in the house.

 

*********

 

That night Harry wakes up to Liam’s voice. “Mate, we’ve got to get a doctor. Just look at you.” “I’m fine, it’s just a bump on the head, don’t worry.” Louis answers. Their voices fade away. Harry turns around and falls asleep.

 

“A proper shiner, Tommo. What happened?” Niall looks at Louis while he’s having breakfast. “Just bumped my head against the door.” Louis shrugs. “Where’s Harry?”

“Dunno, out for a walk I guess. I’m going into town, do some shopping. You wanna come?” Louis shakes his head. “Well, someone bloody well is coming with me.” Niall gets a little annoyed. “Why don’t you ask curly? You two seem to get along fine.” Louis drinks his tea. “Are you daft? If someone spots him there’ll be paps all around the place. Where’s Liam?”

“He’ll be here soon.”

“Just tell him, I need him to help doing the groceries if you see him.” Niall puts his plate in the sink and leaves.


	2. 2

Harry’s sitting on a rock at the lake, his arms around his knees, he’s just staring in the distant. He feels miserable and lonely, not as if it is a new feeling to him. He feels lonely a lot. He’s never had a relationship, only short-lived flings. It wouldn’t have worked anyway with him being closeted. He takes a cigarette and lights it; inhales deeply and exhales.

 

“Since when do you smoke?” Harry almost jumps up. “Louis! Didn’t hear you coming.” His cheeks turn red when he realizes how that could be interpreted. “I know. So? Smoking?”

“Zayn taught me how to do it after that cough incident on the terrace. Remember that?“

"Yeah, I do. Didn’t think you’d try again though.” Harry looks up when Louis sits down next to him. “That looks painful.” Harry points at Louis’ forehead. There’s a bump just above his left eye. Louis instinctively reaches for the spot. “Oh yeah, it is. Bumped my head against the door.” “I see. Last night? I heard you and Liam talking.” Louis looks up. “Yeah Liam got in dad-mode immediately, remember how he used to worry about all of us?” Louis throws a pebble in the lake.

“Yeah, sounds like he hasn’t changed much.”

“Oh he changed, alright. Can I have a cigarette?”  

“Yeah sure. You still smoke?”  

“Tried to quit several times, but failed every time.” Harry lights Louis’ cigarette. Smoking seems to relax the man next to him. Even more gorgeous than he was at the age of eighteen. Although there are bags under his eyes and little black lines as if he hasn’t slept well in a long time.

“You still have the girlfriend?” Louis looks at him in wonder. “You remember that?”

“Of course I do, you were the only one with a proper girlfriend!” Harry smiles.

“No… we broke up.” Louis exhales. “You seem to have a lot of fun in the girlfriend area.” Louis looks at him blankly.

“PR stunts, that’s all.”

“Come on, don’t tell me sexy popstar Harry Styles doesn’t get laid on a regular basis.” Louis mocks.

“I wish.”

Louis finishes his cigarette and gets up. Harry suddenly feels cold, there’s something about this scene, him sitting on the rock and Louis standing that sends a wave of fear through him. Louis looks down at him. “Are you alright?” his voice sounds slightly worried. Harry composes himself. “Yeah, yeah… I’m fine, just getting a little cold.” he lies. “I should be going back.” He quickly gets up and jumps off the rock. “I’ll see you later.” He doesn’t look back.

 

When he’s finally in the safety of his bedroom, he sits down on the bed and tries to catch his breath. What is it about this place? It creeps the hell out of him. Louis being polite, but distant. Liam all nervous, Niall pleasant, but even he’s different from the Irish boy who was full of laughter and fun. And why does Harry feel he misses something?  As if they’re keeping things from him, but why would they? None of them has spoken or seen each other the past ten years, what could they possibly keep from him? He’s probably imagining things.

 

That night he hears someone laughing hysterically. Harry sits up, rubbing his eyes. He listens ; it’s coming from the basement. This is getting annoying. He puts on a sweater and sweatpants, then opens the door,scanning the hall, before he walks, barefooted, to the staircase, leading to the basement. There it is again; someone laughing manically and Louis’ voice. “No… I said NO ! You’ve got to be quiet. I promise we go out tomorrow, alright?” The laughter stops abruptly. “I know you hate it here, love, but it’s just for a little while, I promise. Let’s go back to sleep now, okay?”

Nobody’s answering. Harry feels a shiver down his spine. Louis has got someone in there… either that or he’s not quite right in the head, talking to himself. Harry returns to his room. The house and its temporary guests are more terrifying by the day. It’s not just a movie where he’s lost the script, it’s a mystery movie and Harry doesn’t know the plot. The next few nights are more quiet, but there are still sounds coming from the basement, sometimes human sounds, sometimes the moving of furniture.

 

 

*********

 

 

One morning when he wakes up, he finds only Niall in the house. They sit in the old rehearsal room again. Harry stands in front of the window, watching two birds chirping in the old apple tree. “Niall, can I ask you something?” he asks hesitantly. “Yes, sure, go ahead.”

“Do you ever hear … sounds at night?” Harry continues carefully.

“What do you mean? What kind of sounds? Like from outside or something?” Niall looks at him in confusion.

“No, here… in the house.” Harry clarifies. Niall shakes his head. “No, I haven’t, why?”

“I do, it sounds like they’re coming from the basement… Louis’ room. I-I think he’s got someone in there?” He’s not sure if he’s telling or asking Niall.

“You sure, you haven’t been dreaming?” Niall asks a bit concerned.

“No, no I don’t think so.”  

“I’m sorry, mate. I doubt he has.” Niall continues to play his guitar. “Listen to this, I learned to play your song Little things.” Niall plays the first chords of one of Harry’s hits. Harry sighs, Niall clearly doesn’t want to talk about what Harry just told him. He sits on a chair and starts singing along softly. They play and sing together for the rest of the afternoon. Harry singing and playing one of his new songs for Niall. They make pizza for dinner and watch a movie on Netflix together. It’s way past midnight, Harry and Niall are in their rooms, when Harry hears Louis and Liam coming in the house. They laugh and giggle, like they’re drunk. They walk downstairs to Louis’ room. And then it’s quiet in the house again.

 

It makes him feel a little jealous. Liam and Louis were never close when they formed the group. In fact, Liam couldn’t stand Louis. How come they’re such a close knit now? How can they be when they were never allowed to contact each other in all those years? He decides to ask Liam the next day. He turns on his side and closes his eyes… tomorrow he’ll get some answers.

 

*********

 

He’s on the terrace, smoking a cigarette. Louis’ car is gone… again. Louis doesn’t seem to make much effort talking to him or Niall. Harry is fed up with this entire charade. All he does is talk to Niall, who doesn’t seem invested in bonding either, he keeps to himself most of the time. It’s Harry who initiates their conversations and is trying to seek company. Deep in his heart he wants to flee the place, but he can’t… not yet anyway. He goes into the house. He hears Liam scream for help. At first Harry is confused as to where the scream is coming from. Niall comes running from upstairs.

“You hear that?”

“Yeah, he’s not in his room, I just checked.” Niall breathes. There’s another scream. They look at each other in shock. “It comes from the basement.” Niall says, looking scared.

Harry immediately runs downstairs. The door to Louis’ room is ajar. Harry storms in with Niall following him. The scene in front of them makes them gasp for breath. On the floor is Liam, looking terrified and trying to break free from the man sitting on top of him, holding him down. “Harry, Niall… please help me.” Liam pleads. The man on top of him turns his head slowly. Dark brown eyes looking at them, like a mad man.

“Oh my God!” Niall whispers. Harry nearly faints. There, holding Liam down, is a young man they once knew… Zayn. Niall approaches slowly, but the man is shaking his head frantically. Niall steps back.

“Zayn?” Harry quietly whispers. The man looks up at Harry and his expression softens. He seems to forget about Liam, he gets up and walks towards Harry. Harry doesn’t know if he should run or stay. Liam is silently getting up, Niall keeps still. Zayn reaches out his hand to touch Harry’s hair. He softly strokes the curls and then there’s a small smile on his lips. He hears Liam taking a deep breath. In the corner of his eyes he sees Niall clapping a hand over his mouth as he scans the room. Zayn’s hand travels to Harry’s hand, he grabs it and pulls Harry with him and points to the wall.

Harry’s eyes grow wide. On the wall he sees posters… many posters and pictures of… himself. Zayn seems to be proud of it. “It’s me.” Harry whispers. Zayn nods enthusiastically. He walks to a cupboard and gets out several cd’s and shows them to Harry. All the albums Harry made are in Zayn’s hand.

“He can’t speak, but… he’s a big fan of yours.” Liam explains in a soft voice. Zayn nods and picks up a pen from the table and hands it to Harry. Harry looks at him and then to his albums. He suddenly understands what Zayn wants him to do. “You want me to sign them for you?” Zayn smiles. Harry sits down at a chair and signs the cd’s for Zayn.

 

“What the FUCK?” Louis stands in the doorway looking shocked. He walks in, pushing Liam and Niall aside. “Zayn, darling, are you alright?” he places his hand gently on the man’s shoulder. Zayn looks up and suddenly his eyes spark a fire, he surges forward, ready to attack Louis. Liam immediately comes into action, but he can’t prevent Zayn’s hand hitting Louis’ cheek. Louis winces, turns around and flees the room.

“Zayn, NO! NO!” Liam grabs both Zayn’s hands and looks him in the eye. “Harry go after Louis, Niall help me, please. We’ll explain later.”

Harry gets up and walks to the door where he finds Niall, still silent and with wide eyes. He pats him on the shoulder. “Let’s do as Liam says.” he whispers while passing him. That seems to wake Niall up from his daze. “Yeah… yeah, sure.”

 

Harry calls Louis in the house, but apparently he went out. Harry walks out to the terrace. Louis is leaning against the wall, cigarette in one hand and phone in the other. “We’ll see you tomorrow morning then. Yes, thanks sir.” He ends the call, puts the phone back in his pocket and tilts his head back, against the wall. He brings a hand to his eyes, wiping tears away.

“Louis?” Harry says quietly, he doesn’t want to startle him. “are you alright?” Louis just shakes his head. He throws the cigarette on the ground and wants to walk away, but Harry is quicker. He grabs Louis by the shoulder. “Don’t run away, please… Lou…” Louis turns his head at the sound of his old nickname. His eyes are full of tears. Harry pulls Louis towards him, wrapping his arms around the smaller man’s shoulders. At first Harry fears Louis will fight him off, when he tenses, but he doesn’t. Harry strokes his shoulders gently. Louis hesitantly wraps his arms around Harry’s waist, his resistance dissolving more and more. Harry hears soft sobs against his chest.

Harry buries his face in the soft brown hair, holding Louis close.”Let it out. I’m here, I’ve got you.” Although Harry has mixed feelings about what’s happening. He’s angry, confused and full of questions, but now is not the time. Louis needs him right now. “I-I’m sorry you had to find out like this.” Louis mumbles against his chest. “Shh, we’ll talk later. Are you… did Zayn hurt you badly?” he asks carefully. Louis pulls away a bit, without letting go of Harry. “No, it’s not so bad.” he looks up at Harry. His cheeks are wet from crying, there’s a red spot where Zayn hit him. Harry softly cups Louis’ cheek with his hand, rubbing his thumb softly over the spot.

Louis bites his lip, when Harry brings his head closer. “W-what are you doing?” he stammers, Harry leans back, his cheeks turning pink. He was about to kiss Louis. Oh God, he almost kissed him!  “N-nothing, nothing... “ Harry stutters.”Ehm… maybe we should go back into the house.” He steps away from Louis, afraid to look at him.“You go, I’ll be there in a minute… I promise.” Louis says. “‘kay, good...I’ll ehm...go then.” Harry struggles putting a sentence together. He quickly turns around and walks inside. The basement door is open, but he hears voices coming from the kitchen.

 

“Did you find him?” Liam asks when Harry joins them. Harry nods. “How is he?” “He’ll be here soon.” Harry answers.

“How are you?” he asks Niall. “Shocked, just like you I suppose.” Niall answers. He plays with the cup in front of him. Zayn looks at Niall curiously. It’s like he just now notices that, besides Liam, he obviously knows and Harry, his idol there’s another person in the kitchen. He leans his head in his hands and stares at Niall, which makes Niall clearly feel uncomfortable, but he doesn’t say a thing. He just smiles at Zayn. It’s returned by a smile from Zayn.

Liam pours Harry a cup of tea, just when Louis enters the kitchen. Zayn gets up and walks towards him. Liam, Harry and Niall are preparing themselves for another attack, instead Zayn wraps his arms around Louis and looks sad. He kisses him softly on the sore cheek. “It’s alright, love. We’re fine.” Louis reassures him, carding his fingers through Zayn’s hair. That seems to relax Zayn as he leans against Louis, while Louis sits down on a chair. They all sit in silence. Noone knows where or how to start a conversation.

Niall coughs. “So… Zayn is a big fan of Harry, hmm?” Louis chuckles and Zayn smiles widely. “The biggest, aren’t you Zayn?” Zayn uses his arms to point out how big, making all of them smile. “You’ve got all of his cd’s and DVD’s and lots of posters and pictures on the wall.” Louis says while he looks fondly at Zayn. Harry feels a little jealous, although he’s got no reason to be. Zayn seems to adore popstar Harry. “It’s nice to have a male fan.” he softly says.

“Hey, I’m a fan too!” Niall protests with a wink. “Hmm, do you want me to sign your cd collection too?” Harry grins at him. Niall blushes. “I only got the last two albums.” Liam, Louis and Harry burst out in laughter, Zayn does too… but silent. This seems to break the ice between them. Harry finds that Liam also owns quite a few albums and Louis admits he listens too when Zayn plays the albums. Then there’s a silence.

“For how long have you been with Zayn?” Niall asks carefully. “Ever since _that_ day.” Louis looks down. Harry and Niall look at him, both speechless. “That’s … almost 10 years!” Harry exclaims.

“Yeah… yeah I guess.”

“Liam knew?”  Louis looks at Liam.

“I did.” Liam says.

“I know you guys have lots of things to ask, but… I’m not allowed to tell. Simon’s solicitor will be here tomorrow morning at 10 a.m. It’s part of the agreement. I had to call him once you two found  out…. I’m sorry, please understand.” Louis ends. “Okay, yeah… sure.” Harry nods.

 

*********

 

Mr. Young arrives at 10 a.m. sharp. Liam welcomes him and guides him to the dining-room that functions as a conference room today. The atmosphere is tense, nobody’s talking. Mr. Young takes place at the head of the table. Liam takes his seat next to Louis opposite Harry who is seated next to Niall. Zayn is sitting next to Louis, the medicine keeping him under control.

“Good morning, Mr. Payne, Mr. Styles, Mr. Horan, Mr. Tomlinson and Mr. Malik. As the letter said I’m here to execute late Mr. Cowell’s wishes. Mr. Cowell will speak to you directly from the screen. Thank you Mr. Payne and Mr. Horan for setting up the equipment.” The boys groan in unison;  typical Simon, even after his death he needs to be in charge. Mr. Young presses play and the dvd starts to play. Simon Cowell is seated in the very same room they are in now.

 

 

> “ _Good morning boys. I wish I could have been with you, would have been great to see my creation One Direction together again. Unfortunately when you see this tape I’m no longer around. However I felt the need to clear up a few things. So, let’s continue, shall we._
> 
> _On that dreadful day in August you guys shattered my dream of making One Direction the biggest boyband in history. I had huge plans for you, but things turned out a little different._
> 
> _I’ll start with Zayn ; I know he won’t be able to comment later on, but here is what I knew. Zayn didn’t want to be in the band. Right after I formed the group he came to me asking if he could please not be included in a boyband. I told him I needed his voice and appearance. Without him I would dissolve the group. Zayn didn’t want to do that to you guys so he stayed. His smoking increased in the weeks leading up to the, shall we say, catastrophe ? I heard the other contestants talking about how Zayn took weed and alcohol. I confronted him during his stay in the house. He didn’t deny it, said it was the only way for him to go through with the entire boy band image I was creating. I knew at that point I had to keep an eye on him, he was going to cause trouble._
> 
>  
> 
> _Liam… hello Liam how you’re holding up? Liam was my confidant, weren’t you? Determined to get One Direction to the live shows and make it big. After all, you were the only one who had the X-Factor experience, you would do everything to make it to the finals this time, right?_

Liam’s head is in his hands. The others watch him curiously. “But…” Simon on screen continues,

 

 

> _“the others weren’t as invested in the idea as you were. Zayn couldn’t care less, Niall, Harry and Louis were just going with the flow and see where it would end. You were a little jealous of Harry, isn’t that true? The curly young boy was a favorite with the audience and the voters and his voice was one of the best in the band ; you were afraid he’d outshine you. So how convenient was it, when you saw Harry pushing Zayn into the water? The innocent curly boy attempting murder; you got rid of the reluctant boy band member and the favorite boyband member. But… did Harry push Zayn?”_  

 

“He did ! I saw him pushing Zayn!” Liam shouts. Niall and Harry stare at Liam in horror. Louis stays silent fumbling with the string of his hoodie. “W-what?” Harry whispers, his face is pale and he’s shocked. “You pushed him, Harry! I saw you laughing hysterically and then you pushed him!”

“N...-no, no… it can’t be… I didn’t.”

“Gentlemen, can we continue the tape, please, there’s room for discussion later, let Mr. Cowell finish his speech.” Mr. Young interrupts them.

 

 

 

> _Harry,... dear sweet Harry, so innocent. You loved being part of One Direction, you liked all the boys, but one of them captured your heart. You fell in love. Unfortunately, he had a girlfriend and seemed to be spending more time with Zayn than you liked.”_

Now Harry is the one who buries his head in his hands; how embarrassing.

 

 

> _“You wanted to be with them, join them in their smoking gatherings and drinking sessions, even though your crush tried to keep you from drinking and smoking. You were on that rock with Zayn; both of you drunk and high. Now, we can only assume what Zayn said when he stood on that rock and why you pushed him, but you don’t remember, do you Harry?  You were too high and drunk to recall what happened that day. So maybe you did push Zayn and are responsible for Zayn’s current state? “_

 

Harry is still pale and in shock. He really doesn’t remember and whispers so.

 

 

 

> _“Louis, … rebellious, flamboyant and confused Louis. You were surprised I picked you to be part of One Direction. You thought your vocal abilities were far less than that of the others. You were thrilled to be in the band. From the start you were the leader, the oldest, the one the others looked up to. Little did they know about your insecurities. Were you good enough to perform live on stage? Would you get solo parts? What would happen if they found out you were not so straight as they thought you were? Yes, you had a girlfriend, but she was not the one you were dreaming about, right? A curly young boy, your band member, had wormed his way into your heart, isn’t that right Louis? You felt the need to protect him from Zayn who’d corrupt him with his booze and weed, from Liam who was jealous of Harry._
> 
> _To your horror Liam exclaimed “OH my God! Harry just pushed him, he just pushed Zayn off the rock. Zayn can’t swim!” You hadn’t seen it as you were arriving at the spot just a little after it happened. You immediately dove into the water to find Zayn, while Liam shouted to Niall to take Harry with him to the house. You found Zayn and swam with him to shore; he was unconscious. You ordered Liam to get help from the house. Once Zayn was taken care of by my medical staff, it registered with you. Zayn had been the one who needed protecting… from Harry,.... but was it? You offered yourself to take care of Zayn for the rest of your life, so Harry would be free. How unfair is that? ”_

 

Louis just sits there, his face blank, no emotion visible on his face. Harry feels numb… Louis had had feelings for him?

 

 

 

> _“Niall,... fun-loving, cheerful, oblivious Niall. Just like Louis you were a little insecure about being in the band. You’ve always been more of a guitar player than a singer, so this was all new to you, but you really wanted to try. You and Harry were the youngest in the group and that’s how Zayn, Louis and Liam made you guys feel, even though Liam was just a couple of weeks older than you were. You and Harry just supported each other. But Harry changed, didn’t he Niall? He wanted to be with Louis so badly, he started to smoke and drink.You didn’t approve of it, did you? But Harry just drifted away from you, you felt alone… lonely within the band. You were there on that rock with Harry and Zayn when it happened. You must have seen Harry pushing Zayn into the water. Did they argue? Was Harry challenging Zayn? Did Zayn try to take his own life? Only you will be able to tell; you were sober and not smoking. You hold the truth, isn’t that right, Niall?”_

 

Niall’s face is down, he’s looking in his lap. All the boys are staring at him, but Niall keeps quiet.

 

 

 

> _“So… I think it’s about time everybody tells the truth. I’ll start. When Liam came running to me from the lake, telling me what had happened. I immediately contacted the medical staff and have them drive to the lake. Liam and I ran back to the lake where Louis was trying to get a reaction out of Zayn, but Zayn was unconscious. Zayn was brought to a private hospital I had connections with and I paid them to keep silent. I had Liam and Louis separated from Harry and Niall. Liam was 100% sure Harry had pushed Zayn of the rock, Louis couldn’t confirm, but seeing the state Harry was in, didn’t really doubt Liam’s observation. Niall just kept silent and Harry could only be questioned the next day when he was sober again, he had no recollection of the events._
> 
> _When I got the results from the hospital, I knew there was no way I could keep One Direction alive. Zayn sustained severe head injuries and would never be able to function normally again. So I withdrew the group from the X-Factor competition and released a press statement that Zayn Malik had disappeared and there was currently an investigation going on, but the rest of the group had decided to withdraw from the competition and dissolve the group. Niall and Harry were sent home._
> 
> _I asked Liam and Louis to come and discuss things with me. I told them I wasn’t going to the police if they cooperated. I needed someone to take care of Zayn when he got out of hospital. Louis offered immediately without a doubt. Liam hesitated. I offered Liam a job as a junior producer, part of his earnings would go to Zayn and Louis. Niall was silenced by having to leave the country and not come back, I paid for his education and made sure he got contacts in the sports world._
> 
> _Harry, I had big plans for Harry. Harry was going to replace my One Direction dream, all by himself. He was eager, he wanted to be on stage and how convenient he seemed to have erased the entire event from his mind. I set up a trust fund, telling him it was for his future. Harry signed. Well, you all know Harry’s become a world famous popstar with no care in the world, apart from the fact he’s gay and remains in the closet, but what a small price to pay compared to the rest of you. However Harry, you’ll find your trust fund is… empty. All these years you’ve been paying for Zayn’s medical treatments and housing for both him and Louis. Louis got the odd job, but due to Zayn’s deteriorating health he had to stay in with him and was unable to keep a job._
> 
> _So boys, time for the truth ! Zayn’s parents have been informed and will arrive tomorrow if all goes according to plan, which means Louis is released from his duties. I wish you all the best boys and I will rest in peace.”_

 

Simon on screen raises his glass to them. The boys stay silent, too shocked to react.

Mr. Young scrapes his throat.”I have a few other things to add.” He opens an envelope and reads. The boys look at him, what more can there be. “This house will be sold now that Mr. Cowell’s gone. Mr. Tomlinson, you’re going to have to move out of your place as soon as possible. Mr. Payne and Mr. Styles, both your contracts with Syco will be terminated within a month as it says in your contracts. Mr. Horan and Mr. Malik are free to go, without any obligations.”

Louis’ face is pale, Harry and Liam look down. Zayn just sits in his chair with a solemn expression on his face. Niall is just shaking his head in disbelief. “I’ll leave you gentlemen to it. The house has to be vacated by everyone by the 31st. You’re free to leave as soon as you want. Mr. Payne and Mr. Styles, you’ll both drop by at Syco’s headquarters on the 1st of April, no joke, to sign the termination of your contracts. Gentlemen, goodbye.”  Mr. Young rises from his seat. Niall sees him out.


	3. 3

They all look at Niall, when he returns. “Let’s go to the living room, I think we all need something a little stronger than tea and coffee.” he suggests. Louis sits Zayn in an armchair near the window, handing him his IPod and a soft drink. Zayn smiles, he’s the only one not visibly affected by Simon’s words. Liam sits next to Louis on the couch, Niall and Harry each choose a seat to themselves. “So, who’s going to start; I guess we need to start somewhere.” Niall sighs. “Liam?”

“Where do I start? I remember walking to the lake with Louis after we had to rehearse one last bit with Savan. Louis, correct me if I’m wrong, you had a pebble in your sneaker and stopped to remove it from the shoe, right?” Louis nods.

“When I arrived at the lake I saw Zayn standing on that rock and Harry’s hand on Zayn’s back and pushing him in the water. I don’t remember seeing Niall. That was when Louis showed up behind me, I screamed and he immediately went into the water looking for Zayn.”

Louis nods in agreement. “That’s how I remember it too.” They look expectantly at Harry. “Harry? Say something! Tell me I’m wrong.” Liam shouts at him.

Harry’s eyes are filled with tears. “I-I don’t remember anything. I remember going to the lake with Zayn and Niall, after drinking and smoking under the tree. Next thing I remember is I woke up in the house and Zayn was gone, disappeared. No one ever told me he nearly drowned. I liked Zayn, I don’t see why I would have pushed him… you make me feel like I’m a monster and I can’t correct you, maybe you’re right. I wish I remembered.” Harry says quietly while looking at Zayn, whose eyes are closed, his head slowly swaying to the beat of the music on his IPod.

“Louis believes you, so two can’t be wrong, right?” Harry snaps. Then Niall’s hand is on Harry’s hand.

“That’s not what happened.” he says. Niall takes a deep breath. “I sat on that rock just behind you and Zayn. You were both drunk and high. I only came with the two of you, because I was scared something would happen… and it did. I was there, but couldn’t prevent Zayn from jumping into the water.”

“H-he jumped?” Harry’s eyes are wide.

”Yes, Zayn jumped. He was feeling brave, he went on how he could make it on his own without being in a stupid boyband, he never wanted to be in in the first place. I got a bit angry, because he sounded so ungrateful for the opportunity we got. You, Harry, tried to convince him it could be fun, reminding him of all the silly things we’d already done together as a group. Last thing he said before jumping was he was going to conquer the world… alone. You tried to grab his shirt to prevent him from going into the water, but you missed. That’s what happened. Next thing I know is, you started laughing hysterically, Liam was screaming from the shore that you pushed Zayn in and Louis was in the water. You stopped laughing and you were shaking like a leaf, Harry, suddenly totally speechless.

Liam ordered me to take you to the house and that’s what I did, for your sake. You were totally numb, in shock. At the house we immediately got separated and we never saw each other again. I didn’t get to tell my story. They put me on a plane the next day without an explanation and the advice to never, ever contact any of the One Direction boys again. If I did there would be consequences. I was 16 and scared to death. That was also the point where I decided to go back to school and on to uni and never look back at my X-Factor experience. Most of the time I managed to push it away, but it became harder when Harry showed up on TV and in magazines. I always wondered what happened to all of you. God, how I wished I could have told my story. It would have saved us all a lot of trouble.” Niall finishes holding his head in his hands.

 

“Fuck Harry! I’m so sorry, so very very sorry, I blamed you. GOD, what a mess I created…. I was so sure… so sure.” Liam’s tears run over his cheeks. Harry just sits there, he’s not guilty… he’s not. Suddenly Louis gets up, he looks angry, tears are running over his cheeks, his whole body is shaking. “All these years… all these goddamn years I’ve been taking care of someone who decided to jump? Liam… what the hell?! You were 100% convinced Harry pushed Zayn. I-I sacrificed everything so you could continue your career, Niall would be left alone and Harry wouldn’t be prosecuted. My God, all these years… for what? Lies? Secrets? And now Zayn will be taken away from me as well as the house that was our home. What am I to do? I have no home, no skills, no education, nothing!” And he runs from the room.

 

“Shouldn’t we go after him?” Niall asks nobody in particular. Liam shakes his head “No, just let him.” Harry feels anger pooling inside of him.

“I’m going after him, who knows what he’s going to do to himself, maybe this time I can save someone.”  Looking for Louis seems to become a bit of a habit. Harry knows Louis probably ran outside, so he runs over the terrace. He sees a small figure running to the lake in the distant. “Fuck NO!” Harry thinks to himself. Louis is fast, always has been. Harry runs as fast as he can. Bushes prevent him from seeing where Louis is going. When he arrives at the lake, he places his hands on his thighs trying to catch his breath. He looks over the lake and almost falls down on his knees when he sees Louis standing on the rock… that same rock, looking down into the water.

“No! NO!” Harry screams. “Don’t you dare!” Louis doesn’t respond, just stares into the water. Harry runs to the rock and climbs on it. “Louis, please… turn around.” he softly pleads when he’s behind him on the rock. “I’m not going to jump.” Louis replies hoarsley. “Will you turn around, please, so I can see you?” Harry is shaking.

Louis slowly turns around, tears are in his eyes. Harry holds out his hand for Louis to grab. Hesitantly Louis grabs it and takes a few steps towards Harry. Harry slowly pulls him towards him and off the rock. “Come here.” he whispers and pulls a defeated Louis into his chest and holds him. “Lou, I’m so sorry; I don’t even know how to express how I feel. One thing I do know: Simon Cowell was a monster. “

“I agree.” Louis sniffs. Harry strokes his hair. Gone is the tough guy he met only a week ago, in his arms is a defeated, hurt and lonely man. “You’re not alone, Louis. I’m not letting you go, I doubt the others will either. Come back to the house with me. We’ll sort this mess out. No more secrets, no more lies.” Louis looks up at Harry, his expression has turned soft. “Thank you.” he whispers.

 

No more lies, no more secrets they all agree. Louis and Zayn move to a bedroom on the first floor for the night, so Zayn won’t feel locked up anymore. Niall makes dinner while Louis sits and talks to Zayn, trying to explain to him that his life is going to change as of tomorrow. Harry helps Liam to gather Zayn’s belongings from the basement. “Harry, I know now is not the time, with Zayn moving away and all, but I really want to talk to you, explain… why I accused you. I’m really feeling awful.” Harry looks up from putting Zayn’s cd’s into a bag. “You should feel awful, you’re right now is not the time.” Liam nods. They continue in silence.

 

They watch a movie that night, it feels like the safe thing to do, avoiding accusations being made, feelings being hurt. They agreed to make Zayn’s last night in the house with them to be as pleasant as possible.

 

*********

 

Saying goodbye is tough, even for Harry and Niall who only spent a short time with Zayn in the house. Niall and Harry hug him, Harry promising to visit him. Liam has to bite his lip to keep from crying when he hugs Zayn. Zayn looks at the three of them, there’s a sadness in his eyes. Zayn’s parents are in the car, still in disbelief and tears, meeting their son, their changed son, after so many years. Louis is going to accompany the family to Zayn’s new home, helping them to get to know Zayn, helping Zayn to understand they’re his parents and settle in his new surroundings. Louis helps Zayn into the car, he’s pulled back by Liam and Harry. “Good luck, mate. I know this is going to be a real tough job.” Liam hugs him. “We’ll be here, waiting for you.” Harry quickly hugs Louis. They wave until the car has disappeared in the distant.

 

“Okay, I’m going to grab the key and you’re coming with me.” Liam says determined. Niall and Harry look at each other with raised eyebrows.

“Remember that cottage on the other side of the lake?” Liam asks as they walk towards the lake. “Yeah, I do. We were always wondering who lived there.” Niall says. “It’s part of the estate?” Harry asks in wonder, he never thought about how big the estate was.”Yeah, it is.” Liam walks in front of Harry and Niall, a steady pace as if he can’t get there quickly enough. They follow the path around the lake, partly through the woods, Harry pulling his hair in a bun, just to be on the safe side. The cottage looks well-kept. Liam opens the door on the side and steps inside. The interior is a combination of cream painted walls and pine furniture, pale blue curtains, a couch in the living room facing a flatscreen TV, light flooding in from the window. Harry looks through the window and sighs. The view is amazing; overlooking the lake and woods and the main house in the distant. Liam went off exploring a few rooms, Niall stands behind him. ”Wow, the view is just stunning!” he exclaims. “Yeah, it is… it’s just beautiful.”

They hear Liam curse when he comes downstairs. Niall looks at Harry mouthing “Uh-oh”. Liam never curses. “I knew it! The bastard! He just left!”

“Ehm… who do you mean? The man who lives here?” Harry tries carefully. “Tommo!” Liam spits. “Louis?” Harry and Niall ask in unison, both not understanding what Liam means. “Yeah. “ Liam grunts. “He and Zayn have been living here all these years. “ The boys’ jaws drop. “Here, near the lake?”

Liam sighs. “I’ll explain. No more secrets, no more lies, remember? “ They nod. “They’ve been living here for almost 10 years. Zayn loved it here, he painted outside when the main house was empty, so noone could spot him and Louis. Whenever the house was used as a judge’s’ house they would stay inside or go camping in the country. I helped Louis, watch Zayn so he could go see his family, friends or go out to a bar, to have some time to himself. Louis had a tough time the first couple of years, coping with his new life, looking after Zayn, a lot of responsibilities. I noticed a change about 3 years ago, he tried to find a job. I asked why, because you, Harry, and I were paying for medical expenses, groceries, insurances. He wouldn’t say, said they needed some more. One night he went out and I watched Zayn, I saw a pile of papers tucked away in one of the drawers in the kitchen cupboard when I was looking for scissors. I took them out: they turned out to be unpaid bills.”

He looks up to Niall and Harry who are listening intensely. “Your trust fund had been blocked, I found out after confronting Louis. You haven’t been paying the past couple of years, Harry. Did you block it?” Harry turns pale at hearing this information.”No, I don’t really have access to it. So … there still should be huge sum sitting in that account?! “ Can you find out?” Liam asks. “I tried to pay the medical bills, so Zayn could still get his medication. I took out a loan to help. Of course Louis tried to find out why he couldn’t get to the trust fund, but Simon’s accountant and solicitor never answered him, they just shrugged him off. Can you imagine how he felt and how scared he was? By the way, he hated the idea of taking your money, but he didn’t have a choice.”

 

“You said he left… do you mean as in he’s not coming back tomorrow?” Niall leans forward in his chair. “All of their belongings are gone, I think he fled, unable to handle the entire mess. Our lifes may change as of now, but nothing like Zayn and Louis’, guys.” Liam softly says. Harry stands up, feeling itchy and angry. “What a mess! So… Liam, what do you want us to do, where do we even start ?”

“Let’s start by sending Louis a text, tell him we know he won’t return and that’s okay. Let him spend some time with his family.” Niall answers. “Harry? You okay with that?”

“Yeah, yeah of course… just, I’d love to talk to him one day… soon.” Harry answers almost in a whisper. “We understand … there are still so many things left to talk about…” Liam nods with understanding. “Let’s get the financial chaos out of the way first… agreed ?” Niall and Harry agree. Liam walks to the kitchen and rummages through the drawer. There are still a few bills in there. “Mainly medical bills. Looks like the medication has changed... again, more expensive pills.” Liam’s voice sounds bitter. “Did that happen often?” Harry asks quietly. “Every couple of months.” Liam answers.

Niall pulls out his phone to use the calculator, while Liam is rattling off the amount on the bills. Niall whistles when he sees the total. “4832 GBP” Liam sighs heavily. “I’ll pay them.” Harry announces from his spot near the window, still watching the lake. “You sure? I can put in my share, I mean, I’m not really contributing, am I?” Niall looks at Harry. “No, I don’t want you to. My trust fund was apparently set up for paying the bills, I’ll pay the bills and I’ll find out what happened to the fund. I appreciate your help, Niall, I really do, but I don’t want you to get involved in this mess financially. “ Niall is about to protest, but Liam interrupts. “I agree with Harry.” ‘Alright, fine, but let me at least help you guys with sorting things out, please?”

“Yes… of course.”

 

They make phone calls. Liam texting Louis and Harry calling his manager to make an appointment. Niall taking care of their meals that day. That night, Louis sends Liam a text, it’s short “Thanks for understanding” and that’s it. Somehow it’s a bit disappointing to the three of them.

 

*********

 

“So the account is empty, even though Louis hasn’t been able to withdraw from it since August 2017, is that what you’re telling me?” Harry’s manager confirms Harry’s conclusion. “Who else had access to the account ? “  “Simon Cowell.”  Harry sits back in his chair, letting this info sink in. “I can’t believe this. He took the money? The man was loaded, why would he need my money?” he mutters to himself. “You know his solicitor, go find out….” his manager suggests. “I bloody well will!”

 

“Simon Cowell dies penniless”  It’s only three days after Harry visited his manager when Liam, Niall and him read the headlines in the newspaper. Harry groans. “I fucking can’t believe this!”

 

 

> _Simon Cowell, owner of music publishing house Syco, former judge of talentshows like Pop Idol, The X Factor and Britain’s Got Talent died, leaving a trail of unpaid bills and debts as his legacy._
> 
> _According to our source, Cowell  owes hundred thousands of pounds. If he had lived, he’d have had to file for bankruptcy._
> 
> _After the last disastrous season of the UK X factor in 2015 and a huge decrease of income due to bad record sales since 2014, things went downhill for Cowell._
> 
> _He started drinking and gambling. Even though he still had a few successful artists under Syco’s name, like Little Mix and Harry Styles, he never coped with losing his popularity with the public after the X factor disappeared from TV._
> 
> _Most of Cowell’ properties and possessions have already been claimed by tax authorities._

 

“I think you better get in touch with that Young fella as soon as possible.” Niall says after he’s read the article out loud to Harry and Liam. Harry grabs his phone and walks out of the kitchen, the room where they spend most of their time.

 

“You mean there’s no money to claim? He stole from me!” Niall and Liam hear Harry exclaim. After a few minutes Harry returns to the kitchen, his face determined. “There’s no money in the bank accounts. He only has a few properties to his name… I’m going to have this estate valued, see what it’s worth, apparently it’s one of Simon’s properties.” Liam and Niall look up in surprise. “You want… this place?” Harry shrugs. “I’m going to make a few calls.”

 

He makes an appointment with a realtor for that afternoon, after Mr. Young has given him the details of the property. Except for the house, the cottage, the lake and the woods, there are a few other buildings and land. It’s quite extensive and worth a little less than the money Simon owed him. ‘He could have sold this place instead of stealing from me.” Harry mutters when the realtor leaves.

“You think Young will do it?”

“I hope, it’s one claim less, besides I could do a lot of damage to Simon’s reputation if I go to the press, telling the One Direction story.” Liam looks petrified. “You’d do that? Don’t you think we have a say in that too?” “Liam… I don’t, it’s just something I could threaten to do, but I would need your and Niall’s support to out that threat to Young.” Liam is visibly relieved.

 

Louis hardly keeps in touch, he only answers if Liam sends a text. By the end of the week Niall leaves to go back to Ireland. Liam and Harry are going to see Zayn in his new home.

 

*********

 

They arrive in Bradford just after lunch. The home is a modern building just outside the centre of town. “I’m Liam Payne and this is Harry Styles. We’re here to visit Zayn Malik.” Liam announces at the reception desk. “I’ll get Marlon for you, he tends to mr. Malik on his shifts.”

A dark haired young man appears through the doors a few minutes later. “Mr. Payne and Mr. Styles, nice to meet you. Follow me, please.” They walk through the hall, white walls, grey doors to the unit with the name “Peace”.

“How is he doing?” Liam asks. “Quiet, introvert, stares mostly out of the window.” Marlon says. He sounds a bit disappointed. Liam looks at Harry with raised eyebrows. Marlon opens a door. “Zayn? You’ve got visitors, mate.” Zayn, seated in a chair near the window, slowly turns his head. His eyes grow wide when he sees Liam and Harry. He gets up quickly and hugs Liam first and then turns to Harry, touching Harry’s hair. Harry smiles at him. “Good to see you, Zayn.” he says. Zayn smiles.

“I’ll leave you alone with him. I’m in the office down the hall if you need me.” Marlon says. Zayn shows Harry his newest fan item, Harry’s biography. “Ah, right. You want me to sign it?” Zayn nods. “Did your parents buy it?” He shakes his head. “Your … sisters?” Liam tries. Again a no from Zayn. “Wonder who else visits him.” Liam mumbles.

“Louis?” Zayn’s smile grows. “Louis got you the book?” Zayn nods again. “He comes to see you often?” Again a big smile, but then he suddenly stops, turns back to his chair and stares through the window. Both Harry and Liam try to engage him in their conversation, but Zayn doesn’t respond anymore. “I think we better go. “ Harry whispers to Liam. They say goodbye, Liam kissing him on the top of his head. “He looks so sad, not like the Zayn I knew all these years. He was creative, sweet most of the time. He had his tantrums of course, but this… it’s like I’m looking at a different person. I don’t think he’s happy here.” Liam is almost in tears when they’re in the hall.

“Let’s see that Marlon guy for a minute.” Harry wraps an arm around Liam and leads him to Marlon’s office.  Harry knocks. “Come in.” They step inside. “Hi, can I help you?” Marlon looks up from behind his desk. “Yes, I hope so.” Harry answers. “Take a seat.” Liam and Harry sit down. “How can I help?”

“We were just wondering, does Zayn get many visitors?” Harry asks. “Oh yes, his parents and sisters and that young man, Louis, who cared for him in the past. He’s here several times a week.”  

“Zayn’s changed, he doesn’t look like he’s happy here.” Marlon sits back and sighs. ‘That’s what Louis keeps saying too. He takes him outside sometimes, but we just have a small court. I understand Zayn’s used to being outside in the country, it’ll take time for him to adjust. I can’t deny it’s heartbreaking to see the state Zayn is in, every time Louis says goodbye. I think it will take a long time for Zayn to feel at home here, he’s not used to institutions like ours.” Marlon answers. “We understand, thank you for your time. We’ll visit again soon.” Harry and Liam stand up, shake Marlon’s hand. “Oh and Mr. Styles… Zayn’s a big fan of yours.” Liam bursts out in laughter and Harry chuckles. “I know, thanks.”

 

They’re both quiet on the way home. “Liam, I’ve got an idea… tell me if it’s crazy.” Harry says when they lounge in the living room that night. “I’ve been thinking what if I could get my hands on this estate and  move in here.” “It’s a bit big for just one person, isn’t it?” Liam says. “Yes… no.. that’s not what I meant. I’ve been dreaming a bit and now that we’ve been to Bradford, I’m more determined to go ahead with it. Just tell me if it’s too crazy or selfish. I want to turn this place into a small hotel.”

“Okayyyyyy.” Liam slowly says. “I mean look at the possibilities, there are plenty of rooms. I could use the west wing as my private quarters. The place needs work, I know that, but the more I think about it, the more I want it. “

“What about your career?”

“I’m forced to terminate my contract, remember and so are you. I don’t think I want to continue singing, not now that I know why Simon turned me into a popstar. I want to do something more with my life, create my own dream. “  

“That sounds beautiful, Harry. I wish I had a dream like yours. I have no idea, what I’m going to do after the contract ends.”

“Help me… if you want of course. It could be yours too. There’s more though, than the house.” Harry takes a deep breath. “I want Zayn to move back to the cottage.” Liam’s jaw drops. “You want…. how? I mean… yes, that would be great! But how?”

“I haven’t thought about it, we could take turns taking care of him, hire a live-in nurse? I don’t know yet. It’s just, that’s what I want most; for Zayn to return to his home and be happy.”  Harry leans his head in his hands. Liam drops on his knees before him and wraps his arms around Harry. “That is wonderful Harry… and you know what? I’m in, I’m going to help you. Let’s make this happen!”

 

It takes a couple of weeks for Harry to persuade the Cowell team to seal the deal. Simon’s wife is eventually the one who decides Harry should get it after she learned the details about the One Direction drama. Much to Harry’s surprise she hugs him afterwards and wishes him all the best for the future and that she’s sorry to hear what happened. When Harry, his manager and solicitor are outside the Syco office, Harry takes a deep breath. “I can’t believe it’s done! Thanks for sticking by me through all this.” He hugs his manager and shakes the solicitor’s hand. Once he’s in his car he calls Liam.

“Hello?” he hears. “It’s done, Liam. I’ve got it! Let’s celebrate! Where are you?”

“With Zayn. He’s not doing very well, they changed his medication again, but to no avail. “ Liam sounds sad. All of Harry’s excitement is gone. “I’m sorry to hear that, did they say what caused it?”

“He feels lonely. Look I’ll talk to you tonight, okay? Glad you got the place. “

“Tell Zayn I said hi.” Harry ends the call.

 

Harry and Liam return to the house on Saturday. “I’ve seen Louis.” Liam says out of the blue. Harry looks up in surprise. “You have? How is he?”

“Not good. He doesn’t look good, seems a bit lost.”  

“I wish he hadn’t left us like he did. I understand why, but… never mind.” Harry looks away. “You liked him… when we were in the band?”

Harry snorts. “No secret anymore is it, Simon’s speech revealed more than we bargained for.”

“So, it’s true. You were in love with Louis?”

“Yeah.” Harry’s cheeks feel warm.

“At the time I didn’t know you were into guys. Niall said he knew and Zayn did too? Only Louis and I didn’t know. Weren’t you out yet then?”

“To my family and hometown friends only.” Harry plays with the rings on his fingers. “I see.”

“Do you think Louis partly stayed away because of what Simon said on screen, me having a crush on him?” Harry feels embarrassed to ask, but the thought has been on his mind a lot. He needs to talk to Louis, wants to see him so badly.

“I don’t think so. That was 10 years ago. I think he’s just scared. His and Zayn’s life have been most affected by Simon’s scheming. Now that Zayn’s cared for Louis lost his purpose in life. He’s got to reinvent himself.”

“Can you invite him over here? I mean I want to tell him about our plans for Zayn, I want his opinion. Do you think he’ll come?”  

“I’ll try, let’s invite Niall too.”


	4. 4

“I texted him that the estate has been sold, so if there’s any of his belongings left he should retrieve them this weekend.” Liam says through the phone.

“Ooh, sneaky Payno.” Harry replies.

“I’ll come on Sunday, I have to finish a song on Saturday. You’ll be okay, if he shows up on Saturday?”

“Yeah, think so.” Harry responds confident. He’s sure he can handle a meeting with Louis Tomlinson.

It’s Liam’s last job for Syco, Harry’s contract has been terminated. He’s had offers from other record companies, but his manager is holding off telling them Harry needs time.

 

It’s Friday morning, Harry just had a delivery of groceries from Sainsbury brought to the house. Grocery shopping in person is still a bit tricky, more often than not he’s recognized by female fans and ends up doing selfies with them, instead of shopping. He’s been here for a week now and the eery and unnerving feeling from when he got here first with Liam is gone. He cleaned the entire kitchen, got rid of old pots and utensils and replaced them. The kitchen is still his favorite place. The big wooden table and chairs in the centre of the kitchen got a thorough scrub and Harry bought flowers and put them in an old jar. He found a fruitbasket in one of the cupboards, cleaned it and is now putting it on the table filled with apples, oranges and bananas. He steps back, crosses his arms in front of his chest and admires his work. He smiles to himself.

 

He hears a car approaching the house. He takes a peek through the window. “Fuck, it’s Louis’ car.” What is he going to do? Wait for him outside with a chance he’s going to turn around immediately? Sit here and do… nothing? Does he still have a key? All of a sudden Harry feels very nervous. He hasn’t seen Louis in weeks. While he’s still pondering on what to do, the front door is opened. Louis yells:“Hello ? Anyone in ?”

 

Harry takes a deep breath and walks to the kitchen door and slowly opens it. “Hi.” he says walking into the hall. Louis stands still, eyes wide and mouthing “FUCK” probably to himself. “Jesus, you scared me! “ he shouts. “Sorry, didn’t mean to.” Harry replies shyly. “What are you even doing here?” Louis asks in wonder. “Uhm, long story. Please, come to the kitchen with me.” Harry motions for Louis to follow him. He hears a deep sigh behind him.

“Please… have a seat. Can I get you anything?”

“Tea would be nice, thank you.” Harry puts the kettle on, he can feel Louis watching him. He gets out a cookie jar and places it on the table. He pours them both a cup of tea and sits down opposite Louis.

“So...uhm, the place is mine now.” Harry blurts out, how else is he going to explain his presence in the house? Louis nearly chokes on his biscuit. “You what? You own this?” he coughs.

“Yeah … long story, I’ll tell you if you want and have the time, but the entire estate belongs to me since April 1st, and I’m not joking.” Harry plays with the cup, looking up at Louis who just sits there, still in disbelief.

“Liam told me to get any of my belongings this weekend, because the place was sold. He could have told me you’re the owner now. I’ll get my things and go, shall I?” Louis sounds a bit cold.

Harry quickly puts his hand on Louis’ before he can run off again. “NO! No, please… don’t go. Not yet, please?” Louis sighs, but nods.

“You see, I got this instead of the money that should have been in the trust fund. The fund was empty Louis. Simon stole the money that was supposed to go to you and Zayn.” Harry explains quietly.

“W-what? Simon took the money? B-but why?”

 

“Oh Louis, Simon died penniless, like it said in the papers. He only had a few properties left to his name, this estate being one of them. I claimed it.” Louis withdraws his hand that’s still in Harry’s and leans his head in his hands.

“Jesus!” he whispers. They’re silent for a while. Harry realizes Louis needs to process the news. Finally Louis asks softly. “What are you going to do with all of it?” Harry blushes. “I have kind of a plan, a dream really, I discussed it with Liam. He’s willing to help, but I’d like your opinion too… so if you could stay for a bit?”

“I have all the time in the world, Harry. I’d love to hear about your dream plan.”

 

Harry takes Louis through the house and points out his plans for each room. Louis smiles at Harry’s enthusiasm. “You really want to do this, don’t you?” he says fondly. Harry looks up at him in surprise and then smiles a shy smile. “Yeah, I do.”

“How about your career?”

Harry shrugs. “It’s not important. Simon only used me to create his dream. I liked the singing and performing, but never liked the entertainment industry, it’s all fake.”

“I see. Sounds like I didn’t miss out then.” Louis’ voice sounds strangled.

“Hey, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to make you feel sad.” Harry apologizes with his hand on Louis’ arm.

“You’re not. It’s just, it would be nice to have a dream like yours. I feel so useless.” Louis reassures Harry.

“I haven’t told you everything yet… I … uhm, eh… have this idea for Zayn.”

“For Zayn? Why?” Louis is clearly surprised.

“I’ve seen him in Bradford too, Louis. Zayn is unhappy. I want him to come back here, live in the cottage like he used to. “ Harry blushes, he hardly dares to look up. Louis doesn’t answer.

“Y-you don’t think it’s a good idea?” Harry feels unsure. Louis looks up at him, his eyes are glancing. “You’d do that for Zayn?” he asks in a whisper.

“Yeah, I want him to be happy and make him feel at home.” Harry fiddles with his rings. “God, you’re quite something.” Harry feels two arms around his neck and Louis plants a kiss on each cheek. “You’re not so bad, curly.”

Louis smiles as he teasingly pulls on Harry’s curls. Harry is still speechless from the two pecks on his cheeks, but the smile on Louis’ face makes him grin too. “So how will you go about that?”

“Liam wants to help, I’ll be here, but I think a live-in nurse might be a solution?” Harry answers. Louis gets quiet. “I see. Yeah, it’s probably the best solution. You need to talk to his parents though.” Louis sits back on his chair. Something has changed. There’s tension again. “You don’t sound convinced. Did I say something wrong?” Harry is confused. Louis looks up at him, there’s a deep sadness in his eyes. “No, no… we’re fine.”

 

Harry shows Louis his plans for the outbuildings and makes dinner for them, while Louis retrieves the last of his belongings from the cottage. After dinner Louis gets up. “Thanks for dinner. I’ll better be going, it’s a long drive.”

"You’re going back to Doncaster?” Harry bites his lip. He doesn’t want Louis to go, but he can also imagine the man wants to leave and go back to his family.

“Yeah, think so. See if I can find  a place to rent there and a job. I wish you and Liam good luck with your plans. “ He picks up his bag and walks to the door. Harry follows him feeling awful. Louis puts his bag in the trunk.

“Louis!” Harry calls out of the blue.

“Yeah?” Harry quickly walks down to the car and wraps his arms around the smaller man.

“Don’t go… please… stay.” Harry almost whispers in his neck.

“Why?” Louis’ voice sounds small.

“I don’t want you to go, I want you here...please… if you want, of course.” Louis wraps his arms around Harry’s waist.

“You think you’ll miss me?” Louis tries to tease Harry, but fails. His voice is quivering.

“Yes…” Harry’s voice is barely audible, he buries his head in Louis’ neck.

“Okay curly… I’ll stay.” Louis says.

Harry looks up. Louis’ face is so close, so very close. He licks his lips and then is unable to stop his urge to kiss him. He moves his face so that their lips are almost touching, giving Louis a chance to create some distance, but he doesn’t. His blue eyes are staring back into Harry’s green, unsure and searching. His cheeks are pink. Then Harry closes the gap between them and brushes his lips against Louis’. Louis doesn’t move, but doesn’t pull back either. Harry slowly moves his lips over Louis’, his heart pounding in chest, afraid of rejection. He feels Louis’ hands move to his head, caressing his curls, his lips move against Harry’s, softly kissing Harry’s lips. It’s all the courage Harry needs. He moves his arms from Louis’ neck to his hips and pulls him closer, pressing their bodies together. Louis’ lets his tongue move over Harry’s lips, asking permission to enter. Harry opens his mouth. Their tongues meet, tease each other and lick in each other’s mouths. Harry moans. This feels heavenly, a teenage dream come true. After all these years Louis Tomlinson is finally kissing him. Harry squeezes Louis’ hips and moves his hand over to Louis’ bum, giving his cheeks a squeeze.

Louis giggles as he pulls back. “You like my bum then?” Harry groans and pulls Louis back into a kiss. His hands not leaving Louis’ behind. He can feel Louis smile, before he pulls back. “How about we take this inside, hmm? “ Harry takes Louis by the hand and drags him inside. “Easy tiger.” Louis teases him when Harry pulls him into the living room. “How much I love kissing you. I think we need to talk a bit before we go any further, okay?” Louis says as he’s being dropped on the sofa. Harry pouts. Louis giggles. “I promise I’ll kiss you some more, I’ve waited long enough.” He admits a bit shyly.

“You… you wanted to kiss me too?” Harry can’t believe what he’s hearing. “Yes, you idiot! Didn’t you hear what Simon said on screen? You wormed your way into my heart when you were 16 and you never left!”

“Oh God! It’s true what Simon said? But… but you were with Hannah?!” Harry is thoroughly confused by Louis’ confession.

“I liked her, but I knew I was attracted to boys and when we first met I was 100 % sure. The more time we spent the more I fell for you. Harry, I fell in love with you during our time here.”  

“I fell for you too. I was so jealous of Zayn, you seemed to spend more time with him than with any of us. I wanted to be with you. It was so frustrating being the youngest and being treated like that.” Harry admits. Louis pulls him close, carding his fingers through Harry’s hair. Harry leans his head against Louis’ shoulder.

“I’m sorry, I never wanted to make you feel like that. I knew I was rather protective over you. The other boys teased me when you were not around. Zayn and Liam knew how I felt about you. We just… never got a chance. I wanted you to know, but then the accident happened. I didn’t want to believe Liam. I asked, I think, a hundred times if he was sure you’d pushed Zayn. Liam always said he didn’t know how else to interprete what he’d seen. He wished he hadn’t witnessed it at all. I think, deep in my heart, I never believed you pushed Zayn, but there was noone to confirm. Simon didn’t want me to see you, said you were in shock and needed to rest. I needed to hear your version of what happened, but after we got back from the hospital you and Niall were gone, back to your parents. I cried myself to sleep that night. I’d promised to take care of Zayn, so the three of you were free. That day I lost my chance of a career, a life and love. It was the worst day in my entire life.” Louis ends his story.

“Oh Lou, if only I had known… if only. God, how I hate what Simon did to us all. ”

“I do too, but it’s no use dwelling on it. We have to move on. I love your plans for the estate and Zayn… do you think... I can be a part of it too?” Louis asks carefully. Harry sits up and looks at Louis, who is now staring into his lap. Harry cups his cheeks and forces Louis to look at him. “Louis, I’d love to, but I, well we all thought you might want to be free of all this. Do what you want to do, make plans for your future? That’s why I didn’t ask you. “

“I appreciate the thought, but in all honesty… I’m bored, I miss Zayn, this place, our home and have no clue what I want to do with my life and… I want to be with you… if you want me … still.”

Harry kisses him on the mouth. “Yes… I still want you, that never changed.”

 

Louis groans and grabs Harry’s neck to kiss him back, hard on the mouth, tugging on Harry’s curls. Harry whimpers at the sudden change in Louis, but he loves a bit of rough, so he’s not going to complain. Louis’ mouth is demanding, his tongue pushing against Harry’s lips, almost forcing entrance. Harry opens his mouth to let Louis’ tongue explore hungrily. It’s wet, it’s dirty and Harry feels so turned on.

He moans and whimpers from just kissing and having his hair pulled. “You’re so hot” Louis’ breathes, pulling back. His eyes are wide, pupils blown, cheeks flushed. “Naked… please get us naked.” Harry pleads in a low voice. His hands are already tugging on Louis’ belt.  Louis pulls his shirt over his head and helps Harry with his’. In just a few seconds all of their clothes are spread out on the floor. Louis is on his knees in front of the sofa. Harry’s legs are spread to give Louis better access to his painfully throbbing and leaking cock.

“You’re so gorgeous, Haz. Always have been, can’t believe I finally get to touch you.” Louis whispers licking his lips at the sight of Harry’s sizeable cock. “Please, Lou.. do something… anything..” Harry whines. He’s hot all over and needs Louis. “I”m going to suck you, love. That okay?”

“Yeah, yeah… please.” Louis’ soft fingers move over his inner thighs to his cock, sending shivers through Harry’s spine. He’s tense, he’s been longing so long for Louis’ touch, it’s almost too much now that it’s happening. Louis gently squeezes the base of Harry’s cock a few times and then lowers his head to lick at the head, small kitten licks from the head to the base and licking a big stripe at the vein running underneath before he starts suckling at the head, making slurpy sounds.

Louis is an expert cock sucker and Harry feels wrecked already. He can barely keep his hips still, he doesn’t want to shove his cock all the way into Louis’ mouth, but boy does he have trouble keeping still. He bites his bottom lip and watches Louis taking him further down. Harry tilts his head back against the sofa, his hand running over his own chest, ghosting over his nipples and pinching them. Louis is sucking in earnest now, his head bobbing up and down faster. Harry feels the familiar heat pooling in his lower body.

“Lou...I-I’m close..” he warns him. Instead of pulling off, Louis hollows his cheeks and sucks hard. Harry feels like he’s exploding, his vision becomes blurry and he comes hard, strings of white shooting down Louis’ throat. Louis swallows and licks his lips when Harry opens his eyes. “FUCK …. that was ….” he waves with his hand “the most amazing blowjob ever.” Louis smirks “I aim to please.”

“Do.. do you want me to...” Harry nods at Louis. He’s still too tired to finish his sentences in one flow. “Uhm… No.” Harry raises his eyebrows when he sees Louis looking down at his own lap. “Oh.” he says. “Ehm… yeah, like I said you look kinda hot when you get your cock sucked.”

 

That night they repeat the action in bed again and again. Harry learns that Louis is loud in bed and that he’s an amazing cuddler. Exhausted they finally fall asleep.

 

*********

 

**_Three months later_ **

 

“Can’t believe the renovations are done.” Harry says while lounging on a blanket on the grass, near the lake. It’s early July. The guesthouse is ready to welcome his first customers. The rooms have been painted, refurbished and cleaned out. Liam proved to be an excellent handyman, Louis painted the rooms and Harry made sure he got the necessary papers to start a guesthouse ; he even took a hospitality course. Niall visited and cooked dinner.

 

Zayn moved back to the cottage and is now sitting on the blanket drawing the lake and Harry. “Almost ready Zayn ? My arm feels numb.” Unfortunately it’s a no and Harry sighs, while Zayn smiles. Louis grins. “Love, you’re doing great. Just another hour, right Zayn?” Zayn looks up and confirms with a nod. Harry rolls his eyes. “You’re joking!”

“Modelling is a tough job, Haz.” Louis smirks. Harry pouts. Suddenly Zayn gets up and shows them his painting. Harry finds it hard to recognize himself in the painting, but it’s modern art Zayn is producing so he gives him a thumbs up. Zayn goes to the house to fetch Liam. Louis joins Harry on the blanket. “You did well, love. Zayn is so happy, just look at him.” They watch Zayn walking away from them.

“Are you?” Harry looks at Louis, hopefully. “I’ve never been happier. I’ve got a home, a job and the love of my life.” Louis runs his fingers through Harry’s hair and looks at him fondly. Harry sighs. “Me too.” and rests his head against Louis’ chest.


End file.
